I can't escape abusive wife who belittles and slaps me – I feel so trapped | The Sun

DEAR DEIDRE: I WANT to divorce my abusive wife but I can’t afford to break away.

She and I have been married for 21 years.

We’re both in our fifties now but our marriage is far from thriving.

She’s got a senior job in adult services for the local council.

I was previously the owner of a very successful electrical business but it folded after the difficulties of the pandemic.

Since then I’ve found it very hard to get back on my feet and, instead of my wife helping me, she shows only resentment towards me.

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I’ve not worked for anyone but myself since I was 16.

But I’ve always enjoyed being my own boss and the thought of applying to work for someone else absolutely terrifies me.

I now have big plans to build a new business but every time I speak to my wife about it she tells me to “go get a real job”.

She is constantly calling me names, ever since she got the upper hand financially.

She even slapped me the other day because I didn’t do the dishes in her time frame.

Admittedly, I haven’t spoiled her lately, as I usually would when I had money coming in.

But that doesn’t give her the right to make me feel like a loser.

I can’t stand to be around her, and it’s destroying me to continue to live with her and her insults.

I’ve told her that I want to file for a divorce, but she just laughs in my face while spitefully reminding me that I can’t afford to.

There’s also the question of where I would live.

I can’t afford to pay rent without money coming in. I feel so trapped.


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DEIDRE SAYS: Making you feel worthless and hitting you is a form of domestic abuse.

You’re not trapped, there is help out there for men.

Contact RESPECT Men’s Advice Line who help men who are victims of domestic abuse (mensadviceline.org.uk)

There is a court fee of £593 when you apply for a divorce.

However, if you really do feel like your marriage is beyond repair then, you can apply for help to pay your court fee if you’re on benefits.

To check if your eligible have a look at gov.uk/get-help-with-court-fees.

My support pack Thinking Of Divorce can help.

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